WHAT A DIFFERENCE A DAY MAKES

What a quagmire. Be happy for James Blake at the expense of our Rafa’s loss? Or be ‘upset’ over the upset? Rafael Nadal and his biceps put up one hell of a fight against Blake, but ultimately super-fly Blake spanked our tapa 6-4, 7-6 in Shaghai. All hope is not lost for nimble Spaniard, as he can still qualify for the semifinals if he spanks the hell outta Davydenko and Robredo. I’m giddy with anticipation.

Oh god no…Andy Roddick has now lost to R-Fed in eight successive matches. As the Swiss machine celebrated his 4-6, 7-6, (10-8), 6-4, defeat over Mr. Mojo, I celebrated another Lick of the Racket Andy gave us. “I put myself in a position to win tonight, it’s tough right now … I felt like I was unlucky not to win that one,” Roddick said. A-Rod next faces Nalbandian in his last round robin match.

ADAM SCOTT

Burberry babe Adam Scott is currently ranked number four in the golf world, and with good reason. The beast had his best year ever on the PGA circuit and is favored to win the Australian Open, which takes place November 16-19th.

HELL YES

Freddie Ljungberg. His name alone sends my libido into summersaults and creates visions of Calvin Klein underwear dancing though my head. The hottest sporn-friendly soccer stud (Arsenal and Sweden) won the Swedish Footballer of the Year trophy “The Golden Ball” at the annual football gala in Stockholm yesterday. Golden Ball indeed.

NL ROOKIE OF THE YEAR

Dominican shortstop Hanley Ramirez of the Florida Marlins won the NL Rookie of the Year award yesterday and gave us some yummy ‘celebration’ photos taken at his home in the MLB hotties breeding ground of the Dominican Republic. Hanley is precious as he kisses his son, but more importantly, who is the fine dude on the far right? I just hope he’s drinking the same water as Hanley.

THE BECKHAM RULE

So, for those of you needing an explanation of the Beckham Rule it goes something like this. MLS teams can add international hotties, like David Beckham, Luis Figo, or any of our Italian treats, to their rosters next year. The three-year initiative will allow teams to sign up to two designated players without exceeding the salary cap. Currently the cap is set at $1.9M, but it is expected to rise to $2.4M in ’07. The league, which pays all players’ salaries out of a central fund, will pay $400,000 of a designated player’s salary and count that portion against the cap, leaving owners to pick up anything beyond that amount. Blah, blah, blah…just bring on the Italian imports and I’ll pay the tariff.

YOU MUST BE JOKING

Mike Ditka has partnered with the Mendocino Wine Company to produce wines. The football Hall of Famer has developed five wines under three labels and by doing so, solidified his foothold in the Mensa reject category. Ditka has created (and I’m not making this up) bottles of Mike Ditka Kick Ass Red, Mike Ditka Chardonnay & Cabernet Sauvignon and Ditka’s “Da Coach” Pinot Grigio and Merlot. All three labels feature a simple caricature of “Da Coach.” And are perfect for smashing over some ones head when your team loses to the Bears again this season. If ya gotta get some: www.MendocinoWineCo.com or MikeDitkaWines.com. Speaking of the Bears, what the ba-jesus is going on with Rex Grossman? The Bears Quarterback will participate, with fans, in the first snowball throw of the year. But wait, its gets worse…the event is to celebrate the return of Starbucks holiday beverages. ARE YOU KIDDING ME? Idiots will have the opportunity to throw snowballs through wreath targets, housed in a three-dimensional holiday-themed backdrop, with finalists earning a chance to go one-on-one in a “snowball throwing” contest with Grossman. I like the idea of a one-on-one with the hottie, but mine doesn’t include snowballs or Starbucks.

OH BY GEORGE, IT’S ABOUT TIME

Don’t ya just love George Foreman. The big, happy, pitch man, puncher, family man, rancher and preacher is gearing up for the shooting of TV Land’s newest reality show featuring the beast called “Family Foreman.” Perhaps this show will explore the differences between his children: George Jr, George the 3rd, 4th, 5th, 6th, and his daughters Michi, Freeda George, Georgetta, Natalie, and Leola. In any case, I can’t wait to see the product placements on this show.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

Publishing notice: I will be taking tomorrow off and will return on Tuesday.

SHANGHAI

I had planned on taking the day off today, but after paroozing the sports world, I felt compelled to share a few special moments that came out of Shanghai. Unfortunately, Tiger Woods fell to South Korean Yong-Eun Yang who fired a 3-under 69 today to record his first European Tour title. His two-shot victory over Tiger at the HSBC Tourney didn’t sting too much, as our favorite tapa was on hand to give us a few Are You Kidding Me moments.

BETTER THAN R-FED

Innocent, sweet, humble, and edible, Rafael Nadal rocked my world something fierce as he and the King Of Beasts, met at the HSBC Tourney. Nadal and his posse of Spanish treats, watched Tigers final round and finally gave me good reason to scream In The Hole while drooling over Rafa and his ‘official’ biceps.

ANDY RODDICK LICKS HIS RACKET

In yet another Are You Kidding Me moment, Andy Roddick also sent my libido spiraling outta control. A-Rod appears to have regained more than just his mojo during the round robin of the Cup. Roddick spanked Ivan Ljubicic 6-4, 6-7, 6-1 while overloading my Wondertwin powers with a simple lick of his racket.

KELLY SLATER GOES IN THE HOLE

Seven time world surfing champion and sexiest wet Athlebrity, Kelly Slater, graces the cover of the Oct/Nov issue of Fairways & Greens magazine. Slaters stunning trail of Athlebrity achievements include being a spokesperson for L’Oreal (while developing a line of organic products for them) and selling more than 100,000 copies of his album “Songs From the Pipe” which he recorded with his group “The Surfers”. But did you know that Kelly Slater is also considered to be one of the best golfers on the amateur circuit? And that sometimes he golfs with our Burberry babe Adam Scott? The yummy profile explains that Slater “found his soul in the sea, but his heart belongs to golf.” These photos of Slater in the sea with his club have given my sporn-demons so much to work with, that I think its best I just shut up.

BOYS FROM BRAZIL

Portugal’s beach soccer stud, Madjer won the Golden Shoe award for best player of the FIFA Beach Soccer World Cup, and I think its obvious why. But Brazil won the championship by spanking Uruguay 4-1 in the final.

SUCK IT BABY

Obviously, Francisco Totti scored a goal. And you know what happens when Totti scores…

DROGBA CARRIES CHELSEA, AGAIN

Is Chelsea beast Drogba the only stud that can kick it in for Chelsea? This season alone, Drogba has scored 14 times for the sexy blues. In a race for the Premiership, Chelsea slaughtered Watford 4-0 at Stamford Bridge and most likely wouldn’t have done so if it weren’t for the fantastic teamwork between Drogba and Andriy Shevchenko.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

HSBC CHAMPIONSHIPS

While Retief, Tiger, and that sexy Indian golfer Jyoti battle in the top three spots, Camilo Villegas is quietly crawling his way up the leaderboard. As usual, we are denied any delicious images of the beast mid-crawl as he currently hovers in 29th place, but that’s okay. After watching how our Camilo Villegas lives, I’m relishing these quite days before the entire the world gets zanzied by the beast and we have to share the kitten. I’d like to keep him to myself and my dedicated readers, but his destiny awaits…as do I for the upcoming Buick Invitational in January, where you can bet your life that I’m gonna get my paws on a Lindeberg belt buckle.

DIKEMBE MUTOMBO IS DA MAN
The classiest beast in the NBA has got to be Dikembe Mutombo. After the passing of Ed Bradley, many people were saddened by the loss, but Mutombo’s statement was the most touching to come out of the sports world. “Today, I feel the loss so greatly about Ed Bradley, the man who traveled with me to the Congo and helped bring my story and my vision to the world. Ed Bradley was the consummate professional and he will be sorely missed. I would like to express my deepest sympathies to his wife, family and CBS for the loss of this very special person,” said Dikembe. And pa-leeze people, remember there is a link on the right for Dikembe’s Foundation. This man and his efforts deserve all the love we can give.

TOUCHDOWN IN SHANGHAI

The world’s top eight tennis beasts from left to right, Mario Ancic, Tomas Berdych, James Blake, Nikolay Davydenko, Roger Federer, Ivan Ljubicic, Rafael Nadal, David Nalbandian, Tommy Robredo, and Andy Roddick pose for photographers during the opening ceremony of Tennis Masters Cup today. The hotties are ready to slam balls at the Masters Cup, which starts on tomorrow.

Solidifying my resistance to R-Fed and his attitude, I do believe these photos accurately reflect who has the biggest ego. I’m praying he doesn’t win.

And a favorite moment came when Andy Roddick received a souvenir from Chen Jing, (Director of Minhang District of Shanghai) during the opening ceremony for the Cup. The look on Andy’s face: priceless.

WHERE IS THE WORLD WAS DIEGO MARADONA?

As the FIFA World Cup Beach Soccer Tournement continues, the hotties are getting a bit violent. The Argentinean boys couldn’t handle the loss to Uruguay on Thursday and argued with Brazilian security after a scuffle with Uruguayan players at the end of their quarterfinal match. Uruguay won 2-1 and had me asking Where in the World Was Diego Maradona and his hot Bodyguard when you need him?

Meanwhile, using those phenomenal mouth-watering legs, Uruguay will face Brazil tomorrow in the Final, while Diego Maradona was spotted going nuts in Mexico City.

TAKE ME TO THE GUN SHOW

A new report claims that NBA and NFL hotties are packing more than muscle. According to the Boston Globe, hotties and team officials estimated a vast majority of NBA and NFL athletes carry guns, legally or illegally, and that the number of handgun owners among them has reached an all-time high. One NFL stud stated that “about 90[%] of players in the league have guns to protect themselves.” An NBA team official, however, said in the NBA it’s “closer to 100%.” Of course, players have been urged to leave their guns at home, but I gotta disagree…what good is a hottie without any guns?

D’BACKS NEW LOGO

The Arizona Diamondbacks’ unveiled their new logo last week. The only reason I care? Because Eric Byrnes, Chris Young, Chris Snyder and Conor Jackson strutted their stuff along the runway as they modeled the new alternate home and away uniforms on Wednesday.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

PUBLISHING NOTICE: Athlebrities will not post on Friday the 10th but will return on Saturday.

MEOW

The wait is over. After torturing our libidos with the prospect of seeing how our sexy kitten lives, the time has finally come. Full access to the lair of Camilo Villegas is ours. See How He Lives, speaks, crawls, breathes, sleeps, putts, dresses, eats, and drives us to scream ‘In The Hole’ every time we lay eyes on this edible gift to golf. Camilo Villegas: See How They Live. A permanent link to Camilo’s spot has also been added to this site.

TIGER WOODS & ROGER FEDERER

I’m not too happy about anyone being compared to Tiger Woods, let alone Roger Federer, and especially when he’s stalking the Tiger. After R-Fed and his woman landed at the airport in Shanghai, they made a quick b-line to the HSBC Championships and hit up our Tiger. Admittedly, R-Fed is growing on me- a little. What he lacks in words, he makes up for with his enthusiasm. Like a giddy child, Federer watched Tiger during the first round this morning in Shanghai, where Federer will be playing in the season-ending Masters Cup.

Warming me up for the Masters Cup are Rafael Nadal and Andy Roddick. Our sexy tapa and Mr. Mojo are training at the Qizhong Tennis Center. Roger Federer will meet David Nalbandian in the opening Red Group match Sunday. Nalbandian beat Federer in the Masters Cup final last year, but don’t expect that to happen again this year. According to a poll on Tennis.com, 67% feel that tennis machine R-Feds gonna win. And only 17% have faith in our tapa. Andy Roddick is also in the Red Group but Rafa and his arms are in the appropriately named Gold Group (along with James Blake). The $4.45 million dollar sporn worthy tournement runs from the 12th-19th.

According to Rafael’s enticing website, our beast flew to Shanghai after attending the World Travel Market in London to represent the Balearic Islands. The Balearic Islands in Spain are a virtual breeding ground for fine Spanish men, including our Rafa…the island paradise is made up of Ibiza, Formentera, Cabrera, Menorca and Mallorca. And I just about lost my mind when I came across this photo of Rafa and his abs. Dear god can he be any hotter?

DRIVING ME CRAZY

Last nights episode of America’s Next Top Model had my motor running something fierce. (Not that I watch it or anything.) During the show, Tyra asked the models to participate in a photo shoot with a professional athlete while pretending they were the ‘supermodel’ girlfriend who wouldn’t give up her career for a hottie. (Never said models were smart). Tyra also choose this theme “for personal reasons” (never said models were smart). I’m not gonna touch Tyra’s personal ‘C-Webb’ motivated reasons because what’s important is the sexy beast who was the show last night. Stanton Barrett. Ex-stuntman turned NASCAR driver, and smoking hot, hot, hot babe. Aside from his mouth-watering looks, this handsome stud also has a big heart and soft spot for kids. He created an educational website for children called Snowfrog.com and dedicates his time to a variety of other kids’ causes. “My passion is kids,” he says. I got your passion right here big guy.

NASCAR GROOM

And yes, sadly, NASCAR driver Jeff Gordon is off the market. Keeping up the stereotype of hot athletes marrying beautiful models, Gordon tied the knot with Belgian actress-model Ingrid Vandebosch in a private ceremony in Mexico. Gordon raked in a cool $80 Million last year, so lets hope the ink is dry on a pre-nup.

FIFA BEACH SOCCER

Music and passion are always in fashion at the Copa….Copacabana…how right Mr. Manilow is. The FIFA Beach Soccer World Cup is currently overflowing with soccer hotties competing on the sand. France’s Didier Samoun (L) celebrates with his unbelievably fine teammate Sebastien Perez during their quarterfinal match this morning at the Copacabana beach, in Rio de Janeiro, Brazil. Brazil’s Benjamin (C) is no match for the stunning legs of Canada’s Angelo Sestito. And when I saw Portugal’s Madjer (far right) hug his teammate Alan after a goal, I was 100% sold on the game. What a beautiful blend of soccer, sand, the beach and men.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

TIGER WOODS, HIS LIPS & THE LEGEND

Wondertwin powers pa-leeze activate, form…of…a…chapstick…in…Shanghai…Tiger Woods was mobbed by Chinese fans after prepping his lips for the Pro-Am event on the eve of the HSBC Championships. I realize that wherever Tiger Woods goes, there is a mob-scene following him, but in China, the fans appear unusually tenacious. After investigating further, I discovered that no wild tigers have been seen anywhere by Chinese officials for more than 20 years. The Tiger has been featured heavily in Chinese culture and tradition for centuries, and has long been thought of as a symbol of strength and power and the subject of awe and fear. Indeed. Tigers also symbolize dignity and prestige, while being endowed with the ability to ward off the fire, thieves, evil spirits and crazy red headed bloggers. But most importantly, (and I did not make this up), the Tiger is thought of as Ruler of the Beasts on Earth. And no one can say that Tiger hasn’t lived up to his name, and then some.

CARMELO ANTHONY DONATES $3 MILLION

Carmelo Anthony continues to melt-in-my-mouth while earning mega hot points off the court. Yesterday the luscious Nugget donated $3 million to his old school, Syracuse University, for a new basketball facility. With his T-shirt and orange Syracuse cap on backwards, Melo just about sent me over the edge. The facility will be named after the smoldering hot baller, who led the Orangemen to the 2003 national title before bolting to the NBA. “It’s what I wanted to do,” Melo said. “The whole city took me in like I was a Syracuse native.”

CHRIS WEBBER: GOOD ENOUGH TO EAT

Philadelphia 76ers & NBA All Star good guy Chris Webber will be opening the first of six family and entertainment themed restaurants. The first restaurant, “Center Court with C Webb”, will host a VIP Grand Opening “Black Carpet” event on Tuesday, November 14. The “Tribute to the Best of the Best” includes a menu of confirmed hotties, including Mike Bibby, Brad Miller, Shareef Abdur-Rahim, Ron Artest, Damon Stoudamire, along with crazy eyes Kareem Abdul-Jabbar. “I’m happy to be opening what will be an immensely successful and popular restaurant’s that families can enjoy together,” stated Webber. “Center Court with C Webb” is located at 3600 North Freeway Blvd., Sacramento, CA 95834. The restaurant opens to the public on Wednesday, November 15. And yes, they are currently hiring.

GOD HELP US ALL
Team Baby Entertainment has named the celebrity narrators for its new kids DVD series, in which officially licensed sports and team footage is interspersed with traditions, stadiums, mascots and images of babies playing with team-specific products. As previously mentioned on Athlebrities, these videos contain some of the scariest footage released in the past decade. Eerie voiceovers and creepy infants cheering do nothing except send chills up my spine. The following people will lend their voices to further scare the hell out of us: Bob Costas, Al Michaels, Mark Cuban (WHY Mark, why?), Regis Philbin, Jay Leno, Pat Riley, George Steinbrenner, and finally, Lance’s boyfriend Matthew McConaughey.

LEBRON GETS BOBBLED

Last night, every lucky fan with a ticket to the Hawks-Cavaliers game at the Q received a LeBron James bobblehead doll. The bobblehead wears the sexy Cavaliers’ orange retro uniform from the team’s ’86-87 season. And I want one…so any of you who feel the need to share; you know where to find me.

BARRY BONDS, KOBE & ANDREW BYNUM

Not quite sure what was going on during the Lakers game last night…but Barry Bonds enjoyed a courtside seat with his adorable son Nikolai, while Kobe Bryant and Andrew Bynum seemed unusually close. The Lakers spanked the T’Wolves 95-88. And I can only speculate as to how Kobe and Andrew celebrated.

CAMILO VILLEGAS DAY

Tomorrow, the highly-anticipated Camilo Villegas webisode from AT&T Home Turf “See How They Live” campaign breaks. It is indeed a beautiful day as we count down the final 24-hours until we finally get to crawl inside the kitty’s lair…

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

ATHLETES IN OFFICE?

Oh, Election Day. What a joy. In addition to the seven time Mr. Olympia, Arnold Schwarzenegger running for running again for Govna of California, there are quite a few other Athlebrities running for office. Pro Hall of Famer Lynn Swann (L), is looking to be the next Governor of Pennsylvania. In the Senate race, Michael Steele, Mike Tyson’s former brother in law, is on the ballot in Maryland, as is Bucks owner Herb Kohl in Wisconsin. Running for Congress from Arizona’s District 8 is PGA tour member Randy Graf, but more notably is a little nugget whom I’ve had the pleasure of meeting. Vying for a seat in Congress, out of District 1 in New York, is Italo Zanzi (R), who is MLB’s VP of Int’l Broadcast Sales & Latin America & U.S. Hispanic Marketing, and also is a U.S. Handball Team member. I don’t know anything about his political views, but I can tell you that after I met him, a new phrase was added to my vocabulary, the Zanzi tickle. You know what it is…it happens every time you lay eyes on a hottie.

ITALIAN BALL? PRICELESS

The Aspire sports academy in Qatar paid $2.4M for a FIFA World Cup final game ball autographed by the Italian team at a charity auction. The price is “a record for an item of soccer memorabilia.” I would have paid double that just to touch any of the winning Italian balls…

DONOVAN MCNABB CLOTHING LINE

Today, Donovan McNabb will host a fashion show at the RBK Concept Store in Philadelphia to highlight select pieces from his new Super Five clothing line. Super Five will be available at Macy’s locations in Philadelphia as well as RBK concept stores nationwide. “It’s an exciting deal for me,” McNabb said. “So many people try to simulate the things that we do and the way that we act, and this kind of gives them an opportunity to dress the way that I dress.” Huh? The collection claims to be the brand’s first signature men’s lifestyle apparel line created for an NFL player. Do men really wanna dress like a NFL Player- whatever that means? I must add a note here in reference to the above photo. While searching for yummy images of hot athletes, I discovered Brad Trent photography. Check out his site for some of the best portraits around.

NBA CLOTHING LINE

Also of interest, the NBA has partnered with Colony Sportswear “to create a menswear collection of jackets, ties and dress shirts” under the name 52nd & 5th. According to Sarah Talalay of the South Florida Sun-Sentinel, items include navy worsted wool or black leather jackets with the team’s logo embroidered into the jackets’ lining that retail for $348 and $648, respectively. Striped ties with the team logos sell for $39.50. Dress shirts “come in three styles and include French cuffs and silk knots in team colors or logos at the cuff or in the weave” and retail for $87.50-89.50. One word comes to mind: cheesy.

BEACH TENNIS SEASON IS COMING

Beach Tennis USA, which launched the hybrid sport of beach tennis in North America last year, today released its mouth-watering schedule for the 2007 National Tour. This will be the company’s third season promoting beach tennis, and my first season promoting it. Why? Because a few months ago, two beautiful assets, Alex Cancado and Chris Henderson, caught Athlebrites eye and gave me a Zanzi like never before. Hotties will kick-off the tour in March with two events in Florida before heading west for four events in Southern California. The tour ends in Long Beach, New York in August with the 2007 National Beach Tennis Championship. I suggest checking out this sporn-fest on sand. For more info and the full schedule, check out www.beachtennisusa.net.

TIGER WOODS AND THE HSBC CHAMPIONS TOURNEY

Oh to be in Shanghai right now. My Mandarin would come in handy as I walked around asking Nar you luguan? Our golf babes are busy promoting the Tour, with Tiger Woods participating in promotional events, playing table tennis and helping lucky little raptors with their putts. And call me crazy, but is that the same boy in all the photos with Tiger? If so, put that kid on my payroll! With five million dollars in prize money, the Shanghai tournament is the richest in Asia. Last year, Tiger finished runner-up to David Howell, but if he can spank him this time, it will be his 10th trophy for the year. Tigers first round is Thursday.

OUCH
As I indulged my pirate fantasy via the Raiders game last night, it wasn’t until the last two minutes of the game that things got hot. Raiders beast Tyler Brayton served Seahawk Jerramy Stevens a knee to the groin that even I felt. Brayton was appropriately flagged for unsportsmanlike conduct, then yanked and spanked from the game. The scuffle prompted several awesome comments from the game’s announcers. Kornheiser: “That knee is going to be shown on every sports talk show in America tomorrow 15 times, and people are going to clamor for a suspension.” ESPN’s Mike Tirico: “Not just from a football and a suspension standpoint, but from a manhood standpoint, that was lame.” ESPN’s Joe Theismann said the Raiders have “turned into a classless operation.” Oh yes, but they certainly don’t lack any entertainment value. Doing as Kornheiser predicted, I now share the delicious event with you.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

BURBERRY DONE PROUD

Burberry babe Adam Scott cruised to a three-stroke victory at the Tour Championship at East Lake Golf Club yesterday in Atlanta, Georgia yesterday. Being one of the few men who can pull off plaid pants, Scott raked in his fourth career PGA Tour victory, and earned his fine-ass the last spot at Kapalua for the winners-only Mercedes-Benz Championship that kicks off the 2007 season. With a purse of $1.17 million, hottie finished a career-high third on the PGA Tour money list and if the Athlebrity gods are smiling on Scott during the upcoming tourneys in Asia, he could spank Phil Mickelson and his wife outta the number three world ranking spot by the end of the year. And nothing would make me happier.

TIGER WOODS ON COURSE
Tiger Woods has been a busy little bee. Over the weekend, he and Charles Barkley were spotted at the Floyd Mayweather Jr.-Carlos Baldomir boxing match at the Mandalay Bay in Vegas. And no doubt, Woods asked Barkley his opinion about his latest project. Today, the mighty beast announced the creation of Tiger Woods Designs; a golf course design company that plans to create “enjoyable challenging” courses around the world. “My goal is to provide a unique collection of amazing courses all over the world that represent what I love about golf,” Tiger Woods said. “I’m very excited to announce the formation of this company and get to work on finding the right projects for my first few courses.”

“I’ve had the luxury of playing golf around the world, and I’ve spent a lot of time evaluating how to play all kinds of courses,” Woods said. “I’d like to share my experience and the lessons I’ve learned and hopefully create some amazing, fun courses. There are golfers everywhere that may never get a chance to play a links course in Scotland, a tree-lined course in America or the sand belts of Australia. Hopefully I can bring some of those elements into their backyards. I wanted to wait until I felt I had enough golf experience to launch Tiger Woods Design. I’ve been working very hard over the last decade to get a feel for all kinds of courses and really understand the best elements of design. Now, I feel I’ve logged enough time and learned enough lessons to start this venture.” No word yet on whether his designs will include crawl worthy greens, but my money says they do. For more info: www.tigerwoodsdesign.com.

WHERE WAS MATTHEW?

The mayor of New York congratulated Lance Armstrong as he crossed the finish line after completing the New York City marathon. Armstrong, who was hoping to finish in less than 3 hours, crossed the finish line at 2 hours, 59 minutes and 37 seconds. What a man, what a man, what a man, what a mighty, mighty good man. “I think I bit off more than I could chew, I thought the marathon would be easier,” he said. “(My shins) started to hurt in the second half, especially the right one. I could barely walk up here, because the calves are completely knotted up.” Sounds like someone needs a massage?

CHELSEA BLUES

My Chelsea wing-girl wasn’t able to watch the game with me, so I kept her up to date via text messages. When I told her that Tot’Ham was up 2-1 and John Terry had been spanked via a red-card, her response was poignant and profound. “Son of a motherless goat.” Unfortunately, because she couldn’t see how fine the son of a motherless goat looked topless, I was forced to whip out my camera and capture the magic. This was a big game fueled by passion, power and energy, as Chelsea lost to the Tot’ham Spurs for the first time in 33 league matches.

IN OTHER MATCHES

I had to be held back from molesting this photo of super fine West Ham stud, Bobby Zamora (C) who restrained sexy Arsenal goalkeeper Jens Lehman (2nd L) from whooping some ass during Arsenals loss. In another part of the world, fans weren’t having such a great time (far right). As one policeman laughs, fans of the International football team run outta the Olimpico stadium as the riot police snipe out supporters of the Gremio team during a match of the Brazilian championship yesterday. Looks like fun.

I’m all for European men kissing each other, but not when the world is watching, and not when your shorts are riding up your butt. Real Madrid’s Ronaldo and Beckham shared an intimate moment before Real Madrid lost to (Spanish league) Celta 2-1. Ronaldo was later seen crying, as Beckham astutely followed a topless Fabio Cannavaro from the field.

CARMELO ANTHONY GETS COVERED

Electronic Arts announced today that Carmelo Anthony will be the cover athlete of NBA STREET Homecourt, the fourth chapter in the 3-on-3 basketball videogame franchise. Melo has already appeared on the covers of NCAA® March Madness 2004 and NBA Live 2005, and this newest cover will make him the first athlete to ever appear on the cover of all three of EA’s basketball franchises. “I credit a lot of who I am today as a player to my days playing on the streets in Baltimore,” said Melt-in-my-mouth. “My homecourt in Baltimore will always be a part of who I am, because that’s where I gained the skill and desire that has made me successful in basketball. NBA STREET Homecourt represents real street basketball and the place where it all started for me.” Damn Melo- pa-leeze, stop teasing me with those arms!

NBA CRACKDOWN
If you so much as grunt during a dunk, you could be fined. Under the new “show no emotion” NBA rules, Melo has been ejected. So have Rasheed Wallace, Mike Bibby and a host of other edibles. According to Peter May of the Boston Globe, hotties and coaches were called for 30 technical fouls in the first 17 games this season, in comparison to the seven technical fouls that were called in the first 17 games last season. Tempers are flaring and passion is taking over as our sexy ballers comment.

Detroit bad-boy, and repeat offender Rasheed Wallace (L) on Commissioner Stern: “He’s trying to turn players into robots because of the dress code and with this no-tolerance law. It takes the fun out of the game.” After receiving his third spanking of the season Saturday, Wallace said, “They’re going to have to do something about this crazy zero-tolerance law. That’s retarded. In my mind, it’s kind of like a slave and master or father and son. You’ve got your little son and (you say) don’t say nothing back to me — and to me, that’s totally wrong. It ain’t like that in any other sport” The 76ers tattooed kitten Allen Iverson said, “These things have nothing to do with the game. I don’t see no reason to concentrate on stuff like that — the officiating, the shorts and wristbands, dress code.” And I couldn’t agree more-except for the shorts, I always got one eye on those.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

CAMILO VILLEGAS: PEOPLE MAGAZINE EN ESPANOL
Once again, our sexy lawn crawling Columbian has caught the eye of another publication. Camilo Villegas appears in the newest edition of People Magazine En Espanol…but we need not understand Spanish to get this gist of the article. “Aquí te presentamos a los guapos que, con su belleza, talento y carisma, lograron quedaron en nuestra exclusiva lista de los solteros más deseados. Disfrútenla.” Talent and charisma? Indeed. The 24-year old Lindeberg wearing kitten says “Mi moda es diferente…Estamos acostumbrados a ver los golfistas vestidos de una manera muy clásica, muy tradicional.” Camilo’s different mode is definitely to blame for our eyes straying from Tiger, Ian, or Adam, and it’s this different mode that keeps us purring year round. (Thanks again to our favorite East Coast Camilo Villegas correspondent, Elena, for this updated info).

Additionally, as you know, Camilo Villegas signed a three-year endorsement deal with Stanford Financial Group. A Stanford rep said the feline-libido tickler will wear the company’s logo on the right side of his cap as well as make personal appearances and participate in various ads. Personal appearances? Hello! And make sure to keep your eyes open for the upcoming national campaign featuring Camilo Villegas to promote the Stanford St. Jude Championship (formerly the FedEx St. Jude Classic) in Memphis, which begins airing in January. More importantly, Stanford Financial has also committed to helping Villegas create a charitable foundation in his hometown of Medellin, Colombia, details have yet to be finalized and will not be announced until ‘07. Trust me peeps, I’ll be following this very closely. In addition to Stanford Financial, Villegas has sponsorship deals with J. Lindeberg, Cobra Golf and FootJoy, as well as ‘relationships’ with Red Bull & Caremark. Last week, he shot a sporn worthy ad to run as part of Titleist’s popular “Sign Boy” spots, and he is the only golfer to participate in AT&T’s “See How They Live” campaign- which breaks in 6 days. His agent, IMG’s Clarke Jones, said he is hoping to finalize a deal with a high-end watchmaker by the end of the month. “It just never stops with him,” said Jones. And it never will…

BURBERRY BABE ADAM SCOTT

Adam Scott finished yesterdays round at the Tour in Georgia with a 1 under par for a 69. Adam commented that “my short game was great today, and I really chipped beautifully and feel that my game is back to where it was before my break”. Thank god. Scott remains tied for third and is poised to give us a double-de-licious weekend of golf-sporn on TV.

LAMAR ODOM AND GOD

I’m not a big fan of mixing hotties with god, but props to Lakers hottie Lamar Odom for keeping the faith. Odom is launching a line of religious apparel called “Son of Man” that will include shirts and jeans “by artists he commissioned.” Odom’s Rich Soil Entertainment will release its first album next year, and he and his partner “will turn their attention to several film projects.” And yet another Athlebrity going astray…

BODE MILLER: SPORTSKOOL
“Bode believes he can do anything, especially on a pair of ski’s.” NOT. But I have to say, after a much-needed Bode-hiatus, he looks pretty cute again. Don’t get too excited, his Mensa reject status remains in tact, especially after reading that the on-demand TV network Sportskool will begin posting on its Web site exclusive content from “Skiing with Bode Miller,” an original ski instruction series featuring U.S. ski team coach Phil McNichol and Miller that will debut on December 5. Bode’s first lesson is given from a bar. If ya just gotta see it, www.sportskool.com.

MLB HOTTIES IN JAPAN

The MLB All-Star Tour team is currently touring Japan and I gotta give props to the fans for knowing how to get an autograph from Chicago White Sox & Japanese sensation Tadahito Iguchi. Hotties of interest on the roster include Mets 3B David Wright, SS Jose Reyes and P John Maine, who met with Japanese Prime Minister Shinzo Abe in Tokyo. Wright gave Abe a Mets jersey with Abe’s name on the back, and also gave a sly, sexy look to the camera. The ML babes are in Japan for a five-game series against their Japanese counterparts, starting today.

POWER YOGA FOR BASEBALL
Another great way to get close to the hotties is to become their yoga teacher. Gwen Lawrence is one such person. This lucky woman is a yoga instructor to hotties from the Yankees, NY Giants and NY Red Bulls. Now, in an effort to expose more young athletes to the benefits of yoga, Gwen has launched the Power Yoga for Sports series of home DVDs. Each DVD will provide a yoga workout for a specific sport, including baseball, football, and soccer. The first of these DVDs, Power Yoga for Baseball, is now available. (Warning: there are no hotties in the DVD). “Yoga is not simply sitting around omming all day” she says. But I’m omming at the thought of any hottie doing the warrior, plank, or downward dog, which Lawrence claims, “actually translate into similar movements used on the playing field.” One baseball hottie had this to say about Yoga: “Each pose has allowed me to feel muscles I never knew I had.” You don’t need yoga for that my friend, just me.

SASHA BARON COHEN

Opening today is the much-anticipated Borat: Cultural Learnings of America for Make Benefit Glorious Nation Kazakhstan. If you have no idea who Borat is, then you are missing out big time. Borat is one of the many characters by comic genius Sasha Baron Cohen. (No relation to the figure skater). One of Cohen’s alter ego’s, Ali G, is an Athlebrity favorite and staple in my diet. Last year, the NBA teamed up with Ali G, who interviewed several NBA hotties including Shaq, Dwyane Wade, Kobe, Richard Jefferson, Steve Nash, Robert Horry etc…in case you missed any of the Ali-G NBA Video Promos, here’s one of my favorite extended versions. Just sit back, relax, and fall in love with my main man, Ali G. The video has also been added to the Athlebrities YouTube group.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

TEN QUESTIONS FOR SHAQUILLE O’NEAL

Sean Gregory probed the mind of big daddy Shaq with 10 questions in this months Time magazine. One of the questions asked was, of course, about the Ball. Q: “The NBA is using a new ball this year, and you’ve been a pretty vocal critic.” Shaq: “The ball is terrible. It’s something we’ll just have to get used to. Playing with the new ball is like going to a gentlemen’s club, seeing an exotic dancer and then going home and playing with a plastic blow-up doll.” Shaq has a blow up doll? Kinky beast. Read all questions and answers here.

CIAO BELLO

Yes, yes and yes…Raptors rookie Andrea Bargnani, who is from Italy, held two-count them-two pregame media conferences last night before the team’s opener against the Nets. One was for the Italian press and one was for North American media. This young, fresh 7 foot tall Athlebrity is a bit gun-shy when it comes to all the media attention he’s been getting, but hopefully he’ll get used to it, because we’re not going away. Hottie is the first European to be drafted No. 1 in the NBA and popped his NBA cherry last night, admitting that he was a ‘little nervous’. “This is a new experience for everybody, because this is the first time in the NBA (that a team) has had so many European players.” Hopefully, the liberal European media will deliver us some yummy shots of Bargnani, as last night the Italian media coverage included representatives from Vogue Italia, La Stampa, La Republica, La Gazette dello Sport, & Corriere della Sera.

CAPTAIN DEL PIERO

Italian dynamo and Juventus stud, Alessandro Del Piero, received an ‘all-times’ captain’s armband during a ceremony to mark Juventus’ 109-year history. He also received a commemorative jersey, which I plan on liberating from him as soon as the opportunity presents itself.

BLAKE VERSUS HAAS

One of the finest thoroughbreds to grace the tennis court, James Blake, lost today’s match against Tommy Hass in a lightening fast spanking 6-4, 6-2. This breaks my heart…

SPEEDO HOTTIES: MY LIFE UNLEASHED

Unleashing my inner demons, Speedo is now offering digital downloads of its hottest swimmers as part of the company’s “My Life Unleashed” campaign. Featured athletes include 8-time Olympic medallist Michael Phelps…4 time Olympic medallist Ian Crocker…and 2004 Olympic gold babe Ryan Lochte. The campaign can be seen here and features little snippets of personal info and these sporn-collectable downloads.

THANK YOU

I wanted to take this opportunity to thank Ellis Hobbs of the New England Patriots for doing an interview topless, and Tom Brady for smiling. The Patriots will meet their AFC rivals, the Colts, Sunday night in Foxborough. Brady fielded questions about what it will feel like to play against former Patriots super stud kicker Adam Vinatieri. Brady responded, “I’ve got a bunch of Super Bowl rings because of him, he is always going to be a good buddy.” Good buddies, that’s hot.

RAFAEL NADAL SPORT MAN PRO FRAGRANCE COMMERCIAL

Just in case you’re in need of a tapa-fix, check out this unbelievable commercial of our beast Rafael Nadal. He gets wet in the rain, walks around topless and sprays his flawless body with the fragrance. The ads in Spanish, but the body language is all we need.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com

NBA HOTTIES

The NBA season officially opened last night. Winners and losers alike were edible as they filed into the arenas and filled my heart with lust. Making me eat my words were Steve Nash and Luke Walton. Both hotties made me purr with their short hair and off court threads. And double-delicious Dwyane Wade received his 2006 Championship ring prior to the Heat game against Ben Wallace and the Bulls. The Heat’s championship rings, made by Jostens, have an eight-karat gold image of the Larry O’Brien Championship Trophy surrounded by “at least a few dozen small diamonds” and the words “World Champions.” The Heat would not disclose the cost, size, weight or number of diamonds in the ring.

KEVIN GARNETT IS HONORED

Yesterday, lupine beast Kevin Garnett was honored with the NBA’s J. Walter Kennedy Citizenship Award for outstanding service and dedication to the community. The sexy Timberwolves player stepped up to the plate for Katrina relief efforts and donated $1.2 million to Oprah Winfrey’s Angel Network to build 24 houses over the next two years. He also played in a charity basketball game that benefited Katrina victims and donated $100,000 to the tsunami relief effort in Malaysia. The guy just doesn’t stop giving back. “I want to say out of the many awards I’ve won, I’d have to say that this is probably the most gratifying just because of the results, of what comes out of it,” Garnett said. “I think we all give every day. But for some strange reason, I get an award for it.” It’s not a strange reason KG, if you spread love and you get it back.

LANCE ARMSTRONG: DETAILS MAGAZINE
So I just finished reading this months Details magazine with super stud Lance Armstrong on the cover, and I gotta say, I’m about this-close to jumping aboard the ‘Are they gay’ bandwagon. Granted, the interview touches on Lance Armstrong’s Foundation, his battle with cancer and the French, but also explores the ‘relationship’ between Lance Armstrong and Matthew McConaughey.

“Our friendship just kind of developed,” explains Armstrong. “Livestrong just happens to be the most deliberate guy I’ve ever met,” says McConaughey. McConaughey also says Armstrong’s first problem is that he lets it (rumors) get to him, and Armstrong says “He’s got a good perspective on this whole thing.” I felt like I was reading an interview with two high school sweethearts…writers’ slant or truth? Either way, its dangerously wicked entertainment.

GQ MAGAZINE: THE SPORTS EDITION

The sporno of all magazines is this months GQ. I mentioned a few days ago that Dwyane Wade is on the cover, but inside I failed to point out some noteworthy hotties. First of all, Athlebrities with thier offspring=hot. Who best to elicit maternal feelings than Manny Ramirez or Ben Wallace? Kelly Slater (R) and his blue eyes…priceless.

Eric Staal was also profiled in GQ, under the header ‘Eric the Conqueror’. This 22 year-old, 6 foot 4 inch hockey stud deserved more than a 2 page spread, but the photos by Bruce Weber made up for the lack of info about this NHL ice melter.

I GOT YOUR THUMB RIGHT HERE

Thumb-sucking celebrations. Friend or Foe? I, for one, say friend. You can practically hear the chills runs down my spine each time Francesco Totti sucks his, and in a startling discovery yesterday, I caught Liverpool hunk Luis Garcia sucking his thumb after his second goal. Someone pa-leeze get these boys a pacifier before I need medication to pacify myself.

CHELSEA: BAD BOYS IN BLUE

In the 51st minute, Frank Lampard kicked in the second goal and the Chelsea boys in blue rolled on the field like a big ball of love. But not before John Terry effectively showed FC Barcelona player, Deco, who’s his daddy. Terry, the enthusiastic and charismatic spitfire, earned himself a yellow card after grabbing Deco by the neck during the big showdown yesterday. Didier Drogba kicked the hell outta the ball, scored a goal, got a bloody nose and sent my libido into spasms. The match ended in a 2-2 draw and left me speechless.

CALL IT LIKE IT IS
This is an open invitation to Brian Kinchen to come work for Athlebrities anytime he wants. Why? Because ESPNU has taken the college football analyst off the air due to comments he made during Saturday’s telecast of the Northern Illinois-Iowa game. Kinchen said that receivers need to catch the ball with their hands “because they are ‘tender’ and can ‘caress’ the ball,” and after a pause, he added, “That’s kind of gay.” Kinchen: “I sincerely apologize for my extremely poor choice of words.” What poor choice of words is he talking about? Tender or Caress? (Both of which should be a staple in any broadcasters vocabulary.) Okay, sure, the ‘gay’ remark was uncalled for, but props to Kinchen for his astute observations and proper use of the words tender & caress.

COBI JONES SPREADS SOME LOVE

We have another hottie stepping in to ease the chaos created by our simian president. MLS legend, eternal Athlebrity, and Los Angeles Galaxy babe Cobi Jones, will join the ranks of those who earn hot points by giving back to the community. Jones has joined Little Feet, Big Goals and the Sports Authority for a national awareness campaign to bring more than 50,000 soccer balls to kids in Iraq. Following a press conference on Monday, November 6, Sports Authority stores nationwide will feature Cobi on store displays welcoming consumers to donate a soccer ball for $10.00. Every soccer ball donated will be distributed overseas. “To provide soccer balls to a child who wants nothing more than to share a smile with their family or friends is a priceless gift,” said Cobi “Soccer provides such an instant enjoyment and communication between one another, and I’m happy to share my love for the sport while also lifting the spirits of Iraqi children.” For more info check out: www.littlefeet.com.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com