DAVIS CUP

The US was spanked outta the Davis cup by those amorous Russians today when Andy Roddick lost to Dmitry Tursunov. Thank god Youzhny was left out of the intimate ‘celebration’…

Our little Rafa also secured Spain’s place in the world group of the Davis Cup for 2007 by spanking another Italian.“It was a team effort, no one is special in this group. Circumstances dictated that I played three matches but the team is everything,” Nadal told Spanish state television (obviously translated, no?). “I started playing my shots longer and mixed it up a bit more which allowed me to take control and this changed the nature of the match.” Rafa may have permanently changed the nature of my libido as well….playing longer shots and mixing it up? I’m on overload…

And later, when my sweet little tapa learned that he had dethroned David Beckham as God in the church of Athlebritology, he reacted appropriately.

HOMELESS WORLD CUP
I told ya about this months ago, and you all thought I was joking. Today, the opening of the Homeless World Cup kicked off in Cape Town, South Africa. About 500 players from nearly 50 countries are scheduled to take part in the fourth-yes fourth- Homeless Football World Cup. This Cup is billed as an organized attempt to transform their lives. I love this event…it gives a beautiful donation to mankind and more importantly, helps kids and gives them real hope.

Participants include a 17 year-old street kid named Siyabonga Mkhize, who proclaimed: “I am playing soccer for South Africa!” His parents kicked him out of the house a few months ago due to his drug habit and he now lives on the street: “I want to change my life,” he said “I stopped taking drugs two weeks ago. I want to go back to school and study to become a social worker. I am feeling good, because I am playing for my country. I like Kaizer Chiefs. Maybe one day I’ll play for them.” Another teenager, 18 year-old James Steenberg has lived in a homeless shelter for the past 11 years after being abandoned by his parents. “I believe this World Cup will give me exposure. I want to play one day for a team like Manchester [United] or Chelsea,” he said. Event organizer Mel Young said nearly 80% of players in past tournaments had got a new lease on life by finding a job or a home, registering for occupational training or weaning themselves off drugs. “You can coach homelessness out of these players,” he said “Getting involved in sports changes their mindset and gives them self-esteem. Sport can be used as a method of changing people’s lives.”

CHELSEA BOYS

Changing my life? Frank Lampard and his legs. Not only did Chelsea win the EPL match against Fulham 2-0, but Mr. Legs Lampard scored both of the goals.

I have no idea what the hell this is all about, but I like it and I need to see much, much more of it. Blackburn hottie Robbie Savage removed his kit to replace it after having blood on it during their EPL match. And pa-leeze, no emails about how you think he sucks- dude is FINE and naked on the field, I don’t care how he kicks the ball.

LOCKER ROOM: HOCKEY

Robbie Savage may not need a locker room, but apparently the Florida Panthers do-and god bless ‘em for letting the cameras in. The hockey hotties played a pre-season game against the NY Rangers in Puerto Rico on Saturday. The Rangers may have won on the ice 3-2, but the Panthers won on Athlebrities.

EURO BOYS WIN RYDER CUP

Ryder Cup, smyder cup (yawn)…Yes, the Euro team won again. I expect that next year the players will be teamed up with either their wife or girlfriend. They garnered as much attention, if not more, than the actual players. After their victory, European Team Captain Ian Woosnam went a little crazy with the Guinness, while Paul Casey (and his sweaty pits) and Sergio Garcia tried to give us a little eye candy.

Superb eye candy along the ropes included Michael Jordan sucking suggestively on that big cigar, and the hot-hot-hottest ex-president, sexy beast, Bill Clinton.

The best part of the Cup, though, was undoubtedly “Corky.” Corky gets an A+ for the awesome swan dive he took as he got air and dove into the lake on the 18th hole. He was later seen downing a pint of Guinness with Ian Woodsman.

As always, thanks for reading. Delinda
delinda@athlebrities.com