PAOLO MALDINI H&M AD’S

Italian soccer hottie Paolo Maldini has caught the eye of Europe’s largest fashion retailer Hennes & Mauritz as it launches its delicious fall collection for men. I argue that this is indeed a fall collection for ‘women.’ I would look fabulous with that tan cardigan draped around my body. And oh, the things I could do with his tie…

Maldini, the 38-year-old Milan captain, will be featured on posters and ads wearing outfits that beg to be ripped from his body. From suits to cardigans, Maldini represents what H&M called “a more masculine, classic look.” “Paolo Maldini has a natural style that is casual yet elegant at the same time,” said the head of design for H&M. “At the moment it feels right to adopt a minimalist or relaxed approach to fashion design, and Paolo Maldini’s style is a good example of this.” Spot on H&M! His relaxed, smoldering Antonio Banderas-esq sexuality permeates from every nook of his edible body.

LIVERPOOL HOTTIES GET NEW LOOK

Liverpool soccer hotties model the new Liverpool kit for their upcoming futbol season. While not looking quite as comfortable in front of the camera as Maldini, these boys still beg for our attention. One of my favorites, Steven Gerrard looks red-hot, and incredibly irrateted, as he poses in the traditional red home shirt.

“WHEN DID THEY KNOW?”
As football season nears and the hotties check into training camps, the advertising companies are forced to come up with some fresh ads to grab our attention. In an extension of Reebok’s “I Am What I Am” campaign, the latest installment is “When Did I Know?” The 30-second spots feature football studs describing “the moment in his life when he came to believe that he had a gift for the game.” Look for the delicious commercials at the start of the season, as well as print ads in men’s magazines. (I told you men’s mags were the way to go.) Sexy NFL boy-toys to be featured include Peyton Manning, Vince Young, Steve Smith, Torry Holt, DeAngelo Hall and Roy Williams.

I GOTTA RANT ABOUT GATORADE
AH, Gatorade…Is “It” in me? Well, something is in me, and it ain’t Gatorade. The only things I have “in me” are tarnished fantasies of Jeter and Dwyane Wade. Last night I awoke from a Jeter dream screaming, and not in a good way. In this dream, just as Jeter was sliding into home, he transformed into one of “Them.” You know, those scary big heads from the Gatorade commercial?

Please tell me I’m not the only one that feels these commercials must be pulled immediately? It’s cruel and unusual punishment for Gatorade to invade our dreams and destroy our fantasies with scary puppet like computer generated devil dolls with massive heads. I will buy Gatorade by the case for the rest of my life if necessary, just pa-leeze, make them go away!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY BARRY BONDS

Happy Birthday to the big slugger who turns 42 today. Still hot after all these years…and Barry’s 715th home run ball is now taking bids on Ebay. Starting bid for the big sluggers ball? $10k.

Thats it for today. As always, thanks for reading. Delinda