San Diego is currently undergoing an intense heat wave, bringing throngs of tourists to this oh-so-fine city where a great number of them will visit the San Diego Zoo. One such tourist was spotted this morning with his daughter and two hot bodyguards as he took in such sites as floating hippo’s and social apes. Who was this luscious, prissy tourist? Non other than Kobe Bryant. Didn’t see Mrs. Kobe with him, although I suspect she was there. And oddly enough, people were leaving Kobe alone. Well, most of them anyway…

TO SHAVE OR NOT TO SHAVE

Just as I was thinking how crusty Adam Morrison’s mustache is, I discover a terribly shocking video. The second EA Sports ad for “NBA Live 07” featuring the big crybaby, Adam Morrison, is currently airing and I believe, should be pulled immediately. The disturbing 30-second spot opens with a close-up of Morrison’s mouth and mustache, before panning back as he speaks to show his whole face. Morrison: “My mustache speaks to me. It tells me the right combination of ingredients to keep it flaxen. It says together we will return the NBA to the glory of the mustache days: Pistol Pete, Kurt Rambis and Clyde Frazier. And in the off-season, my mustache and I will drive around in a muscle car solving mysteries. Times will be good. My mustache is very wise. ‘NBA Live’ EA Sports: it’s in the game.” Funny thing, as soon as the spot aired, Morrison dropped from first to third in the NBA draft. My vote: Shave pa-leeze!

SUPERMAN

Jeff Gordon’s No. 24 Hendrick Motorsports Chevrolet will feature a “Superman Returns” paint scheme for Saturday’s Nextel Cup Pepsi 400 at Daytona Int’l Speedway. Brandon Routh, the super sexy stud who plays Superman in the movie, will serve as grand marshal!

RAFAEL NADAL: TOO HOT FOR WIMBLEDON?

Tennis Athlebrity Rafael Nadal is so hot, he’s got the officials fainting. The sexy beast, looked on after a court official fainted during second round action in the Men’s Singles at Wimbledon, today. Gotta say, I don’t blame the official one bit, it’s a very successful ploy to use if you really want to meet your hottie.

WORLD CUP HOTTIES

Tomorrow, the stage is set and the hotties are back in action after taking a few days off to prepare for the big showdown. Game one is Germany vs. Argentina, and with it comes a confusing plethora of hotties. I’ve honed in on one such stud, Torsten Frings (far right), who resembles that sweet thing Ace of American Idol fame.

Germany’s Michael Ballack (L) and Jens Lehman have been extremely effective in getting me to cheer for their team.

WIGS AND JIGS
So yesterday, I took the day off to tool around and do a little research. I was on the hunt for the Oakland A’s who were in town playing the Padres. Spotted at the mall was pitcher Dan Haren. Haren was sporting an awesome Oakland A’s green shirt with brand new green sneakers. He moseyed around for a while on his own, before I got distracted by the Wigs. (*Keep reading for an explanation). Also spotted walking through town was the incredibly sexy Eric Chavez. Chavez was hand in hand with a very lucky lady. Had she not been there, he would have needed a bodyguard. Dude is hot, period.

Now, the Wigs. Up until yesterday, I thought I had seen it all, but oh, how wrong I was. Unbeknownst to me, the North American Irish Dance Championships are in town. My only experience, thus far, with Irish dancing has been the spine-tingling Riverdance and the sounds of my father waking from a Riverdance nightmare. Now I have my own nightmares.

I fell upon the competition by mistake when I entered the lobby of the Marriott hotel, and was immediately assaulted by a sea of children. But not regular children. Damien Omen type kids. Coming at me from all angles were little girls wearing big make up, big Wigs, weird dresses, and tiaras. The sounds of clicking shoes echoed in the lobby and in an Alice in Wonderland like dream, my jaw dropped. Most were in street clothes-leaving on their Wigs and make-up-which only added an extra element of fear to the situation. *Several Wigs actually went shopping at the mall.

I pressed on until I found the makeshift gift shop filled with Wigs, dresses, shoes, tiaras, dolls, socks and scary, pushy parents. I tried to understand the difference in the Wigs. A table displayed the Jordan 2, Megan, Sinead, and Grainne styles, all in a variety of colors. You could even purchase hair-care products for your Wig. Young girls eagerly tried on dresses as their parents beamed with pride while shelling out $1500 for a dress. A father was testing the elastic in a pair of special dance socks. One woman was looking for the right Wig for her daughters dress. Competitors were testing out new shoes, making sure they had the “loudest tap.” You could hear the coaches over the tapping “Tap one up, six down tap, tap, tap…” the Irish music blaring in the background. And I hadn’t even gotten to the competition yet!

Forcing myself onward, I entered the ballroom where the dancers were being judged. Its fair to say that it’s the closest thing to being in the Twighlight Zone that I’ve entered encountered. Camera in hand, I frantically tried to snap photos through the tears of laughter emanating from my friend, Debba and myself. These young girls win every award for the scariest people on earth. Nothing could have prepared me for it, and nothing will speed up my recovery. As soon as the video footage is edited, it will be uploaded and shared for all to see. And yes, I am also going to notify Child Protective Services.

I’m spent. As always, thanks for reading. Delinda